The Daily Diary of a Winning Loser

Today, I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained abstinent from refined sugar, I exceeded my daily minimum 64oz water goal,

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Tuesday, 24 March 2015

March 24th, 2015 Or Else What?

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March 24th, 2015 Or Else What?

I've officially decided to take the advice from Janis and not give skin removal surgery another thought or mention until I've achieved a minimum five years of recovery and maintenance. After reading a few descriptions of skin removal followed by regain, I'd rather be safe. Just horrifically painful sounding when the skin needed to expand isn't available in a relapse/regain situation.

One of the things I've learned along this road is to never declare total victory. Never. I can have victories along the way, I can celebrate these victories and feel great. But I know from experience, if ever I declare "I win!" That's when I run the greatest risk of letting go of my grip on the elements of my continued recovery. These are Non-Negotiable and Sacred elements of my recovery, and I must always give them the utmost consideration and respect--or else. Or else what? I don't want to find out, again.

Cocky attracts karma in this game.

I'm grateful, I'm humble, I don't know everything and I'm always learning. I pray I'll keep those strong throughout the rest of my life.

Today was a solid day. It didn't start out too well. I woke with a horrible headache. It kept me home a little longer than normal this morning. I had a colleague cover my show for the first forty-five minutes until I could arrive feeling better.

I tried a different kind of dinner tonight. I grilled catfish and made catfish asiago tacos. Okay--me turning something into a taco isn't really something different. The grilled catfish was different. I prefer different fish for this. I'll likely not use catfish again--unless I'm frying it like I did over the weekend.

My workout tonight was encouraging. I'm getting stronger, pure and simple. I raised the weights and handled it exceptionally well. The elliptical is obviously one of my favorite workouts. The ride tonight was on high--music thumping--lip syncing happening--it was pure fun...I must always decide to make it fun or I won't remain consistent.

A Life Coach Gerri perspective shifting thought: I have years of experience in the do-nothing for exercise department--and little experience, comparatively, in the make it happen department. Which one am I better at doing?

Yep. Make it fun.

My Tweets Today:






















Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean
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Monday, 23 March 2015

March 23rd, 2015 Night Air

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March 23rd, 2015 Night Air

Today was solidly busy from morning until night. I made the most of the time today and made time to get home, cook a great meal and work on some projects of my own. I worked to the point of needing an alternative plan for a workout. I waited too long for the Y.

The night air felt wonderful, just perfect really, for a good walk. Had it been earlier, I would have completed a 5K, but there wasn't time tonight. I still did slightly over two miles.

I feel good about today. I even found time for a short 45 minute nap. That's short for me! I usually take naps that are way too long. This one was perfect. It helped that I had somewhere to be for a work related thing.

Headed to bed. Looking forward to writing more later this week. I received some wonderful advice and counsel about the skin removal surgery topic. The suggestion from Janis to maintain at least 5 years before getting surgery was absolutely right. Thank you, Janis!

My Tweets Today:






















Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean
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Sunday, 22 March 2015

March 22nd, 2015 About The Loose Skin Reveal

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March 22nd, 2015 About The Loose Skin Reveal

A young man by the name of Matt Diaz recently posted a video of his post-270 pound weight loss body with the loose skin many of us are familiar with on a very personal level. His video has circulated on a viral scale and a GoFundMe account set up for Matt's skin removal surgery exceeded its $20,000 goal in less than 24 hours.

I'm overjoyed for Matt. A friend of mine sent me his story and as I read, I was nodding in agreement, totally relating to the thoughts and feelings he described so well.

When I first started losing weight successfully, I had grand ideas of how my body would look when I hit goal. After losing 275 pounds, the realities of extreme weight loss didn't give me the idealized version I had in my brain at the offset. Loose skin has always been a part of this deal. The stretch marks and extra skin are battle scars from a lifetime of morbid obesity.

I admire Matt's courage and I understand his reason for revealing his body for all the world to see.

When the compliments come fast and furious, if we feel like we're hiding something--like we're hiding the horrible truth of our weight loss ravaged body, then we can feel undeserving of the compliment.

We might say, "Thank you!" But inside we're thinking--yeah, but you haven't seen me with my clothes off.  The feelings of fraudulence come from our disappointment in how we look underneath our clothing.

Matt wasn't a fraud before he revealed his semi-naked body. And I'm not a fraud either. Some of the postings on facebook included things like, "Kudos...for not hiding his true self and showing integrity." 

Matt didn't owe anyone apologies for not revealing his loose skin before. I mean really, should people like Matt and me carry around trading cards of our loose skin pictures and hand them to anyone who compliments our weight loss and how we look? Could you imagine?

"Hey, thank you very much for the compliment. You know, I'm really not as good looking as you think. Hold on, let me explain: In the spirit of full disclosure--or exposure, and to not hide my true self--and show integrity...here's some trading cards of my loose skin. Just so we're clear, I'm hideous--you might want to look away. At least I'm honest."

Do we question someone's integrity who chooses not to reveal the loose skin video or pictures? I promise you, Matt and I can both rock a tuxedo like nobody's business. And we have every right to enjoy it without feeling less than because underneath we're cosmetically flawed. Who cares? 

My point is, the most important acceptance and love is our own. And our level of personal self-love and acceptance can't and shouldn't be determined by our willingness or lack of willingness to share those intimate photos and/or videos. Modesty doesn't equate to hiding and lack of integrity.

The closest I've come to revealing my loose skin publicly was while swimming. I don't believe it's necessary to do an all out reveal in the name of embracing our body. I believe it's important to embrace our body and be okay with it--but I also believe it's okay to choose not to disrobe if you don't want to.

The only opinion and feelings about our loose skin that matters is our own. And if we choose to have surgery to get it removed and tightened up, great! If not, that's great too! It's a very personal decision.

I've been back and forth on this topic for some time. I've finally decided I will get the surgery at some point in the future. Getting the skin removal surgery doesn't mean we're not loving and accepting of our body the way it is, it's something we've worked hard for--and if we choose to do it, awesome. I know--even after getting it someday, the scars will remain to some degree. And that's cool with me.

I'm proud of my scars and the hard work they represent. I would like for my clothes to fit better, though. And surgery, someday, will certainly help in that direction!
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I enjoyed a great day today. I prepared some wonderful meals, including my second attempt at faux mashed potatoes using cauliflower! It turned out better than the first time, although still not the consistency I wanted. The taste was great! I'll get it exactly how I want it next time!

I even prepared fried catfish! I love fried catfish. I typically don't eat too many fried things for obvious reasons. It's hard to calculate the calories accurately. I used gluten free flour mixed with corn meal and an unsweetened cashew milk dip for each piece. I measured the oil and then measured again after cooking. It didn't use that much oil. I believe heating the oil to the proper temperature is key in keeping the food from absorbing too much oil. I also patted with paper towels after cooking.

I tend to over-estimate the calories just to be safe. The amounts and counts I entered into MFP for this catfish preparation seemed reasonable--and perhaps slightly too much. But again, I'd rather be on the side of over-estimating than under.

My workout late this afternoon was fantastic. I can truly feel my strength increasing and that's exciting. I can also see it in the mirror. It makes me want to do more. I increased the amount of weight on two different machines, too!

I hope your weekend was wonderful!

My Tweets Today:


























Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean
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Saturday, 21 March 2015

March 21st, 2015 Restful Day

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March 21st, 2015 Restful Day

I've had a restful day. I'm pretty sure I needed it. Getting even more tonight.
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My location broadcast included historic figures, Joe and Molly Miller, the first couple of the 101 Ranch. These actors portray Joe and Molly throughout the region at various events.

I'm looking to catch up on several things tomorrow. I overslept my nap today and missed my YMCA workout. It's a big challenge to not kick myself for this, especially since I chose to not correct the circumstance with something else--instead, I opted to take it easy. I did make some headway on something I've been working on for awhile, so it wasn't a total loss!

 My Tweets Today:


















Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean
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Friday, 20 March 2015

March 20th, 2015 Failure Can't Be Declared

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March 20th, 2015 Failure Can't Be Declared

It's certainly been a busy week around here. I've had too many late nights followed by early mornings. I plan on catching up on sleep this weekend.

I was visiting with my friend, Life Coach Gerri Helms, last night when she reminded me of the important difference between making time and finding time.

After we hung up from our conversation, I thought about it more. The focus of our conversation was on my personal and professional goals. The one thought I kept coming back to was how we make time for things we passionately desire and are not afraid of pursuing. We try to find the time to do things we're passionate about, yet for whatever reason, we're holding back. And that's the point where not being able to find the time becomes a fantastic out. Fear of success? Perhaps. Fear of failure? Could be the case.

If I apply the lessons I've learned throughout this relapse-regain & recovery experience, I realize--there's no such thing as failure as long as we're evolving. Even if the evolution is in a negative direction, there's positive if we're aware and we care to keep an open mind enough to extract lessons from the experience. If we can get past the self-loathing; the constantly brutal assault on ourselves for what we've done, then we're able to clear the path of clutter and very likely, turn it completely around. Failure can't be declared unless we've completely given up. 

I'm grateful for my relapse/regain period. If you haven't followed along over the last eleven months, this statement likely seems ridiculous. If you have followed along, then you know exactly what I'm writing about here. I needed the experience. I needed to take it to the brink of failure, as in giving up, in order to learn the things I needed to learn and fully appreciate. I was right there on the edge of fully committing either way: Giving up or choosing change. 

I made the best decision to choose change instead of allowing change to choose me. I didn't try to find the time to center my focus on recovery. I made time for it because it was and will always be critically important, truly sacred, and passionately non-negotiable.

And if I never write another book, or stand in front of an audience to deliver a talk, or develop new and exciting ways to share my message--If I never make this passion of mine my full-time livelihood--I'm still a success. 

Embracing this truth is helpful to me.

God willing, I will write another book. I will speak about this entire experience on numerous occasions in the future. I will develop new and exciting ways to share my message. I am doing it. I'm making time, not trying to find time. 
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Today was a long broadcast day. I did a location broadcast this afternoon/evening from three to seven at a farm/vineyard/winery. They were offering samples of wine, lamb and cheese. You know how I love my cheese! I made a calorie budget decision when I declined the samples. I decided on a good dinner to be not long after the conclusion of the broadcast--and the anticipation of that meal kept me perfectly fine and patient.

I made today a rest day in the exercise department. I hadn't planned on doing this. It was a decision made late in the afternoon when I realized how incredibly tired I felt. It was the correct decision for me, today.
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This is likely one of my heaviest 'before' pictures.

I'm sleeping in some tomorrow and a little more on Sunday. I have another location broadcast tomorrow from ten a.m. to two p.m. I plan on making it into the YMCA for a good workout both Saturday and Sunday. I plan to do some outdoor grilling and I plan on giving faux mashed potatoes made with cauliflower another try this weekend. I think the second time will be the time it turns out right. The first attempt turned out to be an opportunity to learn. If you were one that shared your experience, thank you for the assist!

My Tweets Today:


























Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean
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Thursday, 19 March 2015

March 19th, 2015 The Best Care I Can, Each Day

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March 19th, 2015 The Best Care I Can, Each Day

I enjoyed lunch out with my oldest daughter today. We dined at a country style type place. I asked questions until I was comfortable with what I ordered. "What's the milkfat percentage of the cottage 
cheese?" "How lean is the beef in this hamburger steak?" There was a time when I wouldn't have asked anything like these questions.

Now, it's part of me taking the best care I can, each day.

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#tbt Lately, I've considered getting rid of the facial hair. This intense little stare of a photo without facial hair was somewhere along the road of my initial weight loss. I was obviously trying really hard not to smile. This transformation stuff is serious business, I suppose. I'm pretty sure I was trying my best to be sexy and seductive. Why? Because feeling that way was something very foreign to me, still is. I was giving it my best shot in this photo. I look at it now and think, oh brother-this guy has so much to learn!

I had a great reminder today why it's important to log my food into MFP before consuming. My dinner had the potential to get out of hand. It was gluten free pizza and pasta. Had I not entered the ingredients and amounts first, I could have assembled a plate with way too many. Instead, it was amazingly low cal. Oh, and delicious! In my opinion, it's very important to like what we eat along the way. See the dinner tweet below!

I was grooving to some REO Speedwagon on the elliptical tonight, when suddenly my animated silent lip sync rendition of Time For Me To Fly, got out of control. The wire from my earbuds became snagged by the machine's handles and with six minutes left in my elliptical ride, my phone went flying to the floor.

I was one of two people still in the fitness center area. I had to get someone to grab the phone for me. Because if I stopped, walked around, picked it up and got back on, all of my numbers from tonight's workout would be lost. And I needed an accountability tweet at the end, by golly! I wasn't getting off the machine until my 30 minutes elapsed. Finally I noticed the other guy in the center wasn't wearing earbuds, I asked him to help and he was happy to help! I was almost stuck out there!
My Tweets Today:






















Thank you for reading and your continued success,
Strength,
Sean
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Wednesday, 18 March 2015

March 18th, 2015 Sometimes It Is

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March 18th, 2015 Sometimes It Is

I once proclaimed "it's never too late." Sadly, sometimes it is.

I met Ramsey Moore on location for a film he and I did together in the summer of 2003. (The film was Reality: The Movie, a spoof on various reality TV shows. It never made it to distribution in any form.) Our scenes were together. We played a sportscasting team. We spent the entire day together in 100 degree Fresno heat. We kept in touch after that day via email and eventually social media, but we never worked together again. I had moved back home to Oklahoma and Ramsey was firmly planted in L.A. and doing very well.

He was incredibly nice to me. He made an unforgettable impression on me that day. I didn't tell him I had packed up and headed home already, and that I had flown back out to do this one last commitment. I remember him inviting me to a stand-up show. I deflected and changed the subject.

Had I stayed in California, I'm certain Ramsey and I would have become good friends. I was so happy for him when he started doing bits regularly for Jimmy Kimmel and when he worked with Ashton Kutcher on MTV's Punk'd.

When I found out about his passing via Facebook yesterday morning, I felt an incredible sadness. He was only a few years older than me. He died of a massive heart attack on Monday.

Reading through the endless stream of facebook friends leaving words on his timeline, it was clear. The unforgettably positive attitude and presence he shared with me that day, was something he shared with everyone he came in contact with over the years. He was a gifted actor, stand-up and someone who lived to make people laugh.

We were both stand-up comics and we were both in excess of 500 pounds. I wish I could have helped him in some way. I know that none of us are guaranteed a certain amount of time on this earth, right now is all we have, but in a way, I felt a touch of survivors guilt. I could have very well had the same trajectory as Ramsey. I feel blessed; very lucky, because I made it out--for now. And if I continue making the elements of my recovery important, I'll have a good chance at a longer life. I wish Ramsey could have that chance, too. It's just too late. It's a sad deal. He was one of the really good ones in this world.
photo b2a4aa7d-b3c8-48ec-ac06-b2be55180b42_zpsmodfsdez.jpg
Rest in peace, Ramsey--and thank you for making that 100 degree day in Fresno one I'll never forget--and not because of the heat, it was unforgettable because of you.
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A guest on my radio show yesterday brought me a sugar free bar of chocolate sweetened with Stevia! I waited until today to give it a try. I consumed 1/3 of the bar for 120 calories. It was very good! Even though it's sugar free, I don't think I'll keep 'em around the apartment. I'm a little concerned about my ability to control myself with chocolate bars. I intentionally left the remaining chocolate in the studio kitchen instead of bringing it home. I'll stretch it out and see how long it'll last me. I could easily break it into 60 calorie portions.

I had both pizza and chocolate today. Of course, they were versions that fit my non-negotiable recovery based food plan. It still fun to say, "hey--I had pizza and chocolate--and no guilt!!"

My plan to get into Yoga class this afternoon didn't work. I was too busy at work to leave at 4 or in time to make the 5:30pm class. I'm not sure what I'm going to do about this. When I get busy, my schedule seems to win out over what I need and want to do. It's still something I can change. I can structure my work load better. All I can do is plan on next week, give it an increased priority level and see what happens.

I did get a wonderful workout in at the YMCA this evening.

My Tweets Today:


























Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean
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Tuesday, 17 March 2015

March 17th, 2015 Too Tired

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March 17th, 2015 Too Tired

I'll need to catch up on my thoughts tomorrow night. This day was exceptionally long. Hitting the pillow instead of writing.

I had two location broadcasts today. My day started before 5am and I arrived home for the night at nearly 10pm. Once again, too tired to do anything but drop in bed.

Thank goodness for the Tweets!

My Tweets Today:






















Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean
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Monday, 16 March 2015

March 16th, 2015 Too Late

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March 16th, 2015 Too Late

I let the night get away from me. Now it's too late to get into writing what was on my mind. I'll need to save it for another night!

Highlights: Calorie budget solid. Finished the day with 1,694. After working out and an additional adjustment from Fitbit, my calories burned checked in at 483... Giving me a net calories after exercise calories burned: 1,211. I'll take it!

Abstinence from sugar maintained. Excellent workout at the Y this evening. Water goal hit. Exchanged support texts and emails with others along this road. And I made an amazing low-cal mushroom pizza for lunch today!

Oh--one more thing--Thank you for the amazing mashed cauliflower advice! I'm giving it another shot very soon!

I'm allowing the live-tweets to tell the rest of the story...

My Tweets Today:




























Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean
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Sunday, 15 March 2015

March 15th, 2015 Without Stopping To Catch My Breath

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March 15th, 2015 Without Stopping To Catch My Breath

It's been an exhausting weekend. Helping a friend move concluded today and included lots of stair climbing while carrying things. The calorie burn was excellent. 677 estimated by FitBit. These big burns the last two days have kind of caught me off guard. I don't like to fall under 1200 net calories after exercise calories burned, but I did yesterday and I'm doing it again tonight, although not as big a gap as yesterday.

The best thing about the move this weekend was being able to do the activity without hesitation, without struggle, without stopping to catch my breath while my heart pounds out of my chest. The exercise was well within my range and ability. It felt amazing.

I tried preparing faux mashed potatoes using cauliflower. Tried is the key word. I messed it up by putting in too much cashew milk and light sour cream, then running it through my Ninja blender. In hindsight, I should have blended the cauliflower, added a little--then blended some more--add a little...Instead, I poured it in and then started blending. It was the consistency of cream gravy. I tasted it and you know what? It was pretty good. I'll try again. If I can get the consistency correct, I'll absolutely prepare it more often. Do you have any tips or tricks for me when it comes to preparing mashed cauliflower? By the way--this was the first time in my life to try cauliflower.

I was proud of my dinner. It was loaded with veggies and that's very unusual for me.

Super tired tonight. Letting the daily live-Tweets take it from here. I sincerely appreciate your readership!

My Tweets Today:


























Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean
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Saturday, 14 March 2015

March 14th, 2015 Big Calorie Burn Day

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March 14th, 2015 Big Calorie Burn Day

My plan today included a workout at the YMCA late afternoon. However, helping a friend move quickly became my workout. There wasn't any doubt. I had a great workout today. A lot of lifting and a bunch of activity. Today was the most active day I've had in a very long time. I can't remember the last time I burned 734 calories in one day, but that's the number according to my FitBit Flex.

I took a much needed nap this afternoon before getting up and getting ready for the big Temptations/Four Tops concert. I didn't plan my food as well as I could have, today. I ended the day with 1,601, 99 below my typical 1,700. But with 734 calories burned, my net calories after exercise checked in at 867. That's too low!

I'm letting it be, tonight.

My after concert dinner was way too late and there's no way I'm eating my way up to my usual minimum of 1,200 net calories after exercise calories burned. One low calorie day isn't going to hurt me in the slightest.
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Not that this is a goal. It just caught my eye when the projection popped up after completing my MFP tracking for the day. Whether I call it a goal or not, the number has some significance to me. I lost 275 pounds with that number in mind, achieved it--then after a year and a half of maintaining, found my way back to 394 before turning this ship around. The fact that I'm once again this close to the number I focused on for so long, feels good in an accomplished kind of way. 

Truth is, with weight training, my healthiest weight could eventually end up being where I am today. Or it could end up lower, I really don't know. They say it's important to have concrete goals. And I feel I expressed them well the other night. My goals are to maintain my abstinence from sugar and continue holding sacred all other elements of my recovery. If I do those, the number isn't significant. If I make those things important, I win, every time. My goal is to do just that.

I feel good tonight. It's late once again, but not unusually late for me, especially on a weekend.

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Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean
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Friday, 13 March 2015

March 13th, 2015 Gone Was The Clutter

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March 13th, 2015 Gone Was The Clutter

I wasn't expecting today to turn into what it did, but it did and I rolled with it. It was exceptionally long with a late afternoon location broadcast ending at 5pm and other work related activities continuing until late. This is the second day in a row without an intentional workout, and again--based on my activity, fitbit gave me a nice calorie burn acknowledgement--almost as much of a burn as one of my typical workouts.

When the plans change and an adjustment is required, it can be a tough thing to accept in a positive way. When this happens, I'm happy to report I'm no longer beating myself up over it, at all. It's okay. My trek has never been perfect, it never will be, nor should I, nor will I, even try to make it perfect. The schedule turned the way it turned and I kept a positive perspective. That's a victory.

I'm just glad to finally be in front of this computer screen for a recap of today.

Free food is often a part of location broadcasting. "Stop by and enjoy plenty of free food," always results in some extra people through the door. Some come for the food only, and that's expected. But some do occasionally stick around and find something of interest other than the hot dogs and chips.

Today it was big premium plump and juicy grilled hot dogs with chips and soft drinks. I declined three encouragements, "grab some food," "have you tried one of those hot dogs?" and "be sure to get some food before you leave." One person on staff at this car sales establishment was very familiar with what I do and at one point, they responded for me before I could politely decline: "He can't eat that kind of stuff." 

I quickly added, "Oh, thank you. Actually, I could eat it, I'm choosing not to eat it. I had a good lunch earlier and plan on eating well later. I appreciate the offer, thank you."

Even if I hadn't had a good lunch, I don't think I would have invested the calories in those giant dogs. Each one must have been 350 calories. With a bun and condiments, we're talking a 500 calorie hot dog--and if not, real close! They were exceptionally large hot dogs.

The important thing I noticed was how the allure was gone. It was non-existent. The dogs, the chips, the soda pop...didn't do a thing for me. It didn't trip my trigger one tiny bit. It wasn't a display of will power. Will power suggests we're resisting something we truly desire. I wasn't desiring any of this stuff.

If I had been hungry, perhaps missed lunch, maybe it would have been alluring. My good lunch was still keeping me, so this food wasn't attractive in the least. The reason this is an important awareness point is because in the past, it didn't matter, hungry or not, I was eating. 

Free food taste good--and once upon a time I would have indulged in a second lunch based on taste and the crazy compulsions in my brain encouraging me to enjoy. Gone was the clutter, leaving only the correct and most natural decision considering the circumstances of the day. To me, this is most exciting--to experience this again and again, a confirmation of a switch being flipped to the off position, is such a blessing. Even better, is understanding what flips that switch to the "ON" position and avoiding that stuff!

I'll be up early tomorrow to finish helping a friend move. There will definitely be a Saturday afternoon nap for me. There's no doubt about it.

My Tweets Today:
























Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean
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Thursday, 12 March 2015

March 12th, 2015 My Goal

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March 12th, 2015 My Goal

It was a fairly busy day. I took a rest day from working out, yet FitBit gave me a calorie adjustment of 272 based on measured activity. FitBit agrees, it was an active day!

I helped a friend pack a few things tonight for their upcoming move. I'm not necessarily saying that was 272 calories worth of activity, but apparently it must have helped. I really didn't do much.

This week has been wonderful. The lab results on Monday, yesterday's weigh-in and today, my new smaller jeans feel a little loose.

I don't have a number goal. It isn't 230, although in consideration of my epic relapse/regain, I will certainly celebrate when I return to that weight. I would imagine my transition into maintenance mode will begin at some point between 220 and 230.

Instead of a number, my goal is to keep it steady in all aspects of my recovery. My goal is to maintain my abstinence from sugar. My goal is to continue being active in seeking and offering support. My goal is to continue to exercise regularly and eat well. My goal is to write more. My goal is to continue taking good care of me, physically, mentally and emotionally. I have a number of professional and personal goals. Those are the ones getting my attention instead of a number. Those are the goals that matter.

I don't want to proclaim "I did it!" I want to say with confidence, "I'm doing it, every day."


Throwback Thursday takes us all the way back to six years ago. This is the very first video of me on the internet. Chasing the ball in the racquetball court was one of my preferred workouts when I started losing weight. I lost a bunch of weight chasing that little ball. I don't necessarily like the title I assigned this video six years ago. Instead of "Fat guy in racquetball court," it should have been "Determined guy in racquetball court." I was determined. I still am.

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Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean
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